Tuesday, October 13, 2009

I see Mama in the faces of my sisters.

Way back 29th of June 2004, this date I clearly will not forget. The day that made me feel overly burden with piled problems. This date my mother is gone. I hardly can't accept the fact that the Owner get her life, take her away from us.

It is so hard to lose someone so special and worth living and dying for. I admit that until now I miss my mother so MUCH! I always think of her and I want to experience her presence even for a day. But it is the real truth that all is just a whisper of hope now. She is really gone and I need to accept it though it is so hard.

Being the father and the mother of my sisters (3), I am always the bread winner. I take every breath that I have in order to sustain the needs of my family. My special sister, she is my life.

When Mama is gone, I learn to be more independent and even stronger to face life's trials and uncertainties. I come to explore the essence of me. I come to know my strength. It is really hard to find ways everyday where to find food, money and everything. Maybe if I did not use my potentials and my talent, my sister would probably in misery. They need me much now that Mama is not here.

Oftentimes, during night time, I contemplate life and all I do is to record what emotions I gather through a Diary. I always pray to God for guidance and strength.

Frankly, I see Mama in the faces of my special sister. I see Mama in every mother who I find real happiness and love of their children. I see Mama in me.

Though Mama is not here, the happiness I have felt in life, I have it all through my sisters. I love them so much and I will never leave them behind. That is a PROMISE!

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